You outgrow things, and I’m not talking about pants or shirts or shoes, I’m talking about songs and days and midnight drives along dimly lit deserts of roads between your house and that once place that holds some sort of significance. What’s even more strange is words can not fit anymore, and while it may be sad, it’s actually mostly relieving because it’s evidence that I am not who I used to be and that’s comforting. Sometimes I need that; the reminder that I’m evolving. A fossilized remnant of my past that marks some kind of transition in my life. Find it in the sedimentary rock or something, you know? Somewhere is a scratched-in-the-surface something that indicates I was a baby version of what I am today, and I feel like that’s more significant than anything. I was there. I am here. I am constantly growing even when I feel like I’m stuck. So when I’m miserable about something, I go back to the girl who belonged to someone, some thing, and I realize that she wasn’t even half of the human being I am today. That makes me feel better. And you know what? 90% of those songs weren’t even good, and some of those days I was the saddest I’ve ever been, and those midnight drives were exhausting.
Gentle reminder for myself.
I’m doing it right…I think.
Notes
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